(no subject)

[evowhisperer]

For a new house across town, the place looks remarkably like the one he just left.

Caesar sits down at the most cluttered desk in the lab, taking one swig of coffee before setting the cup aside. Now, to pick up where he left off yesterday...

Comments

[ACTION. Awful celebratory egging shall commence shortly.]

[pineapplesalmon]

[It was an awfully nice security system that the other Caesar had going on here. A bit better than Caesar's own, but the older one was a bit more paranoid. Understandable, all considering. Of course, it really didn't help when half of Nautilus could just ignore it, but it was really the principle of having it in the first place.

It was too bad that it relied on scanning people's DNA. Or that the other Caesar used the same code he did. They really were the same person, weren't they?

He walked in without a problem, carrying two plastic shopping bags filled with... eggs. Yes. Eggs. Not that the other one would be able to tell unless he was on top of them and was able to look down into them. Caesar made sure to double-bag solely for that purpose.]

¡Buenos días!

Hell yes! Also, switching to calling my Caesar 'Cesar' so long as these two are in the same thread.

[evowhisperer]

*Cesar aborts the train of thought he'd just started, looking away from his screens and up at the new arrival. He doesn't quite stand up, but he does smile courteously from his chair. Hey, it's not his fault his double came when he's working. He'll figure it out soon.*

Buenos días, Caesar. What brings you to my lab this morning?

LMAO, easiest way!

[pineapplesalmon]

[Cesar's smiles are coming easier with time. It's a good thing. Something Caesar might not normally notice, but he can be fairly observant when he's looking for it.

Cog is winding between his legs, and upon sight of Cesar, runs over and jumps onto his desk. Hope you weren't working on anything, because Cog is going to demand attention now.]

Oh, just a couple things I wanted to discuss with you.

Indeed

[evowhisperer]

*Cesar holds back a sigh, and grins outwardly at the robotic dog's antics. Its metal canine jaws part to let a pinkish rubbery tongue loll out, forming a goofy simulated smile. Cesar's expression warms a little more.*

Hello to you too, Cog, *He murmurs, obligingly putting a hand on the dog's head. The 'dog's catlike tail does a strange wriggly-waving that Cesar has always taken to be its version of wagging. Cesar pats its head a few times more, unable to keep himself from re-checking the dog over, examining sensitive joins for dirt or buildups. Without lifting his head, he asks,* Is Cog one of those things?

[pineapplesalmon]

[Caesar knew that bringing Cog along was a good idea. Even Cesar couldn't resist his charm. The mechanical catdog was good at getting to people.]

Oh, he's one of the things I wanted to talk about. I gave him a little upgrade.

Cog! [The robot's head turned towards Caesar, and Caesar grinned a bit wickedly.] Give him a kiss.

[Cog gladly did so, licking Cesar's face happily. Yup. His 'upgrade' was a reservoir of slobber-like substance.]

[evowhisperer]

*When the robo-pet goes for his face, all Cesar has time to do is to close his eyes.*

*Slobber. His alternate gave him slobber--which was possibly a lubricant designed to aid in the recovery of small objects to be stored in the dog's secondary throat repositories, actually. Touching a hand to a 'spit'-covered cheek, Cesar struggles for a moment between incredulity and vague amusement, before deciding on both.*

It seems to be working fine. *Then he looks back at his alternate, giving him a pleasant, patient look. He knows his alternate didn't come all this way with bags just to play a minor prank on him.*

[pineapplesalmon]

[Well, yes, that was the intended use, but getting Cesar licked in the face was pretty darn hilarious.

Of course, now his other self was looking at him, and it was going to be harder to do a sneak attack. He'd manage it somehow, though.

Cog decided to help, although not on purpose. He put his paws on either one of Cesar's shoulders and started trying to give him more kisses. Cesar had liked it, after all!]

That's good to hear.

[evowhisperer]

No--Cog!

*Mission 'Distract the gloomy Salazar': Successful. Cesar turns back to the dog, trying unsuccessfully to ward him away from his face. The man rolls his chair back a foot or two, but Cog simply follows him, walking with him startlingly well.*

Cog, down! Down--mmf--Cog!

[pineapplesalmon]

[Ah, Cog always came through in a crisis. Caesar grinned widely and put down the bags, reaching into the one on his right. He pulled out an egg that had a broken top now covered in tissue paper.

Then he lobbed it into the air so that it would land beautifully into Cesar's hair, smashing and leaking confetti.

Caesar tried not to laugh as Cog suddenly stopped his assault, looking confused and leaning up to sniff at the new object. What was it? Why was it in Cesar's hair?]

[evowhisperer]

*Caesar is stunned into stillness for a moment, before turns and reaches for a pinch of confetti to look at. The broken eggshell is caught mostly in his collar, and he snags the remains of it to look at, too.*

... Caesar--is this a cascarón?

[pineapplesalmon]

[Caesar replied innocently.]

If I said no, would you believe me?

[evowhisperer]

Not when the evidence clearly states otherwise.

*His eyes travel down.* You have two bags full of them.

[pineapplesalmon]

I do. One for each of us.

[Curious now, Cog is going to try to take that bit of egg shell into his mouth...]

[evowhisperer]

*Cesar lets Cog eat the eggshell, and considers his alternate for a long, scrutinizing moment. Will he accept?*

*The corners of his mouth crook upwards, and he stands, fighting a challenging smile.*

Good planning. *He has a hand out, waiting for a bag.*

[pineapplesalmon]

[Cog is going to have a primary repository full of egg shells, isn't he?

Caesar gives him an eyebrow.]

Oh, who said I was just going to give your bag?

[Caesar grabs his bag in his left hand, reaching in with his right, and the assault begins. Cesar's bag is still at his feet!]

[evowhisperer]

*Primary and secondary repositories? Yes.*

*Cesar's face morphs into one of surprise, before he scrambles for the bag. He takes heavy fire: he can feel the itching sensation of paper scraps and confetti sneaking under his collar already.*

*There's a stumble and a fantastic slide (which he was privately very proud of afterwards), and the bag is in Cesar's hands. Trying to get some distance and not be such a sitting target, he scrambles behind a computer table, and lobs a pair of eggs over its surface at once.*

*Cascarones. A cherished cultural and family ritual throughout the ears? Check. A private way the Salazar kids (And occasionally adopted uncle) would use to have modified 'snowball fights' during the Summer? Also check.*

[pineapplesalmon]

[Cog goes crazy, letting out barks as he tries to gleefully chase the cascarones shells. Caesar is already laughing at this entire thing, getting Cesar in the back as he retreats. Everything's fair in a war like this, although that he had to admit the slide was particularly impressive.

It seemed this was going to be a success. Maybe, eventually, he'd be able to get the other Cesar out of the lab and into interacting with the others. ... Okay, one step at a time, but there was still hope.

It was then, in his happiness, that he ended up tripping right over Cog as the robot scrambled for the eggs. Caesar flailed and twisted to protect his bag of eggs from touching the ground. Any hit at all would destroy them.

Of course, that left him vulnerable on the floor as he scrambled to get back up while Cog yelped in confusion and fear, but that was a small price to pay for still having ammo.]

[evowhisperer]

Cesar surged around from behind the table, throwing egg after egg at his prone duplicate. There was a pause when a yelping Cog accidentally pranced between the two Salazars, and Cesar cringed when an egg landed solidly against the innocent robo-pet's side. Cog sprang forward with an alarmed bark, robo-tail curling against his legs.

"Sorry, Cog!" Cesar called, rising to sooth the robot. He could just barely see where the dog had retreated to, and Cog peered from behind the chair, ears up and alert. Cesar looked a moment longer--the tip of a metallic tail came into view, no longer tucked defensively away. Those were good signs, weren't they? Cesar had never owned a dog of his own, having lived too mobile a young life and too distracted an adult one, but he thought Cog would be alright. How did one even judge, when the pet in question was a robot cat-dog?

It abruptly came to Cesar's attention he'd wandered and stayed right out in the open, giving his opponent an advantage he couldn't refuse.

"Ah--not the face!" Cesar blurted, scrambling back and bringing his arms up protectively.

[pineapplesalmon]

The distraction from Cog is exactly what Caesar needed to keep himself from getting even more glittery. Falling over Cog had already caused him to be open to enough attacks he couldn't defend against. Of course, the fact that Cesar was distracted meant that he was also vulnerable.

Caesar decided to let him realize it, first. It'd be more fun at that way. With Cascarones at the ready, Caesar waited.

When Cesar realized his folly and tried to get back to safety, Caesar didn't aim for his face--he aimed for his back. And his hair. Oh, Caesar knew from years of playing this game how hard it was to get everything out.

It was now war. The evil grin across his face said as much.

[evowhisperer]

Caesar got his back. Then his hair, then his collar, then his shoulders, then his back again. Glitter was everywhere, glitter was still flying, and Cesar's fate was sealed: he'd been infected with the herpes of the arts-and-crafts world.

This time Cesar found cover behind a free-standing set of bookshelves. There were gaps between each shelf, but he took cover behind a section that had a lot of tall, obscuring boxes, and tossed a pair of cascarones between a gap. One shell turned out to be confetti, but the other was glitter.

"Running low on cascarones, yet?" Cesar taunted, trying to regain some psychological ground. "When you do, I'll be ready!" He straightened to throw another cascaron, before snatching himself out of the way of a well-thrown retaliation.